You do what you love and fuck the rest!

So the thing here is this. I don't always do what is good for me. Sometimes I kiss people I shouldn't kiss and sometimes I say exactly what I shouldn't say. It's hard to know what I really mean. Because maybe today I want you, but you're not promised a tomorrow. It's not like I ever want to say goodbye forever, but I also will not stand for anyone's shit. "So I need to either forgive or forget." If you hurt me, don't expect me to forget. It lingers around a while. I can forgive you though, with a generous amount of graveling. How interesting is it, the idea of either one or the other? Of course there is always a 3rd option, soak in your anger and discomfort and get absolutely no where. I usually take this option, for the others never sound too appealing. But today I sat and thought rationally. (This is another challenge of mine.) Really the 3rd option isn't an option at all, it's more like pressing pause at the worst part of the movie. You never get to see how things get resolved and you can't pretend like you didn't just see the first half of the movie. So all you're left with are the two F's. If you choose forgiveness, you have to face the facts and let go of all the rest. You have to decide to put yourself at peace with the situation. But if you choose to forget you risk erasing anything you may have possibly learned from the situation or movie if you will. So it's obvious right? Forgiveness is key. We have to let go at some point. It's realllllllly hard but I'm trying to keep reminding myself of this and stressing the fact that it's about forgiveness not forgetting. Any-who... I'm thinking I want to develop a bad habit like drinking coffee or buying shoes. Oh and I want to start collecting something so when I'm an old lady I'll have something to show my grandkidlets. I can't wait to be an old lady! I'm really glad I'm finally falling out of my funk. I thought I might be stuck there for a while. But not this time, I got back up on my two freebirdy girl feet and I'm about to leap again. The difference this time is this, I'm not expecting anyone to catch me. It's all me now! It's all free now!