Today my skin itches. I am an independent being. I am fully capable of taking care of myself. I don't need anyone at my bedside when I am ill and I don't need to know that you care with flowers. I am smart. I am sassy. I am strong. Stronger than you may think and I am so unique. You'll never find anyone like me. Never and nowhere. I am all my own. I sleep in my panties because I'm most comforted by 3 heavy blankets on my bed but the addition of sweatpants just makes me sweat. I like to lift my hands during worship in church, mostly when I know the lyrics to the song and I can feel love growing inside my chest. I smile in church too. I promise myself no sweets and I cheat. I dream about cupcakes. I cry because all my favorite people are just too far away from me and there is nothing I can do to change that. I have two boxes of tissues in my room because I found that having two was far less work than one. I dance when my phone rings. I like to feel, and I love people who feel too. I have never found more pleasure in my life than when I look at someone and they just know. They know everything that's wrong or right and they know just what to say or not to say. I am an independent being and I like things my way. But when I love you. When I truly love you, I'll like things your way too. But then how independent does that make me? So I've remained single, mostly because when I love I give away piece of myself and I don't know how to successfully go on being an independent being all while whole-heartedly loving anyone other than myself. This whole damn world is full of vicious circles... you break me, I break you back and it will stay that way until the day when it's not. Until we all figure out that it's not about getting even it's about letting go and loving regardless of the circumstances. Thank you to those who have loved me regardless. It has meant more than everything to me.